Was on the way home last night when mum msged me that papa was worried over the opportunity cost of me taking the diploma. *sigh* I'm not sure how to even begin typing out my thoughts, but it's roughly along the lines of "unsupportive all along" and "why now when I've already enrolled".

I came home, and talked to mama first. She got a little teary eyed as she was telling me what happened, with papa flaring up at her when she asked if he had talked to me to clear his doubts. But at the end of it all, she said she was ok with me taking the diploma. I guess like mother like daughter, really. Mum used to work as a architect, and she loves to draw. So when she came with me to visit the school and view the students' work she probably understood my passion.

On the other hand, my dad was the silent one. Despite my insistence in taking up the diploma ever since I was in my final year, he never agreed with it but neither did he openly oppose it. It was an indirect disagreement of sorts. Sometimes, when I talk to him about the future in general, he would tend to promote the "right" and safer way, which was to just be a teacher and settle down, get a steady pay, save for my future etc. I can't remember just how many times I've heard of such conversations and even my sister, who tried to persuade him on my behalf by telling him it's ok if people don't do it that way gets exasperated with him.

I'm not saying that papa is unsupportive, for as much as he doesn't agree with my decision he still loves me very much as his daughter. He still sends me to the school if I need to make a trip there, if I need anything in preparation for my diploma he would still do it for me, and of course I appreciate that. But it saddens me sometimes over the small things like him not wanting to come and have a look at the school, or not wanting to ask me how are things going on and what I needed to do.

Well, at least he asked when I was starting school yesterday. Guess that's a start. *sigh*

Labels: updates

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