Time sure passes fast. It's going to be april in a few days time.

Finding my general mood to go up and down erratically. One week, I get all happy and the other week, I'll be feeling damn sian and not wanting to do anything, just nua. And it's even worse when there's so much work to do........ and when you didn't do well in something. Maybe I'm an overachiever?

I got back my transcript from last semester. Did quite okay. I didn't top the class, was behind by a narrow margin. Have to hand it to her though, she IS good, and what makes her better than me is that she is a meticulously hard worker.

I got a little shocked by the results tbh even though I was mostly happy. Cuz some things I thought I could have gotten higher, I didn't. Some lecturers really say one thing, but mark very harshly. Against the bell curve, it was okay. But this was against the benchmark for grades, so it means I'm not too good in that part actually =( If I'd known I would probably redouble my efforts into making it really good. Sigh.

The biggest headache currently is editing my group's video assignment. I got the role of the director so it was a heavy responsibility. When I got it, I was VERY VERY apprehensive, but since it was a decision made by the group (via lucky draw) I just accepted my "fate", and tried my best to do it. Ultimately there will be some times in life when things just won't go my way, so I figured it'd be best to learn to go through it and learn from experience.

Back to the project, in short, the camera shots were quite bad (for my standard). Part of the fault obviously went to the cameraman, that's for sure. But I was also responsible as well being the one who was supposed to oversee the shots while filming. I really don't know what to say - we only had half a day to shoot the entire video due to timing constraints, and I didn't know that transferring the clips over to the PC will result in the clips being uber dark if there was not enough lighting. Most of the time, I look at the screen and it was perfectly lit up, that's why I didn't put in the extra lighting. In fact, no one in our group knew till we transferred but it was too late. *stabs chest with knife repeatedly* So we had to colour correct the shit out of those dark shots and many of them turned out grainy due to the amount of white we had to put in.

I wouldn't put the blame on anyone for that matter. There were many "IF ONLY...." thoughts flying through my head. If only, someone knew. If only, I'd be so kiasu and just put the lights in anyway. If only, the lecturer mentioned it to us. If only, we could get the cast back to shoot again. All these thoughts kept going through my head until I felt a little miserable, because at the end of the day what's done has been done and we just have to suck it up. As the director, I would be taking at least half of the blame anyway if the lecturer questions. It's really just bad luck IMO. Damn shitty. Doesn't make it any better that some other group members totally said it in my face that it was my fault. Very awesome. But I acknowledge that because it was my responsibility in the first place.

Anyway, Mac is screwing us all over the place. I really don't like using a Mac, and using FCP on it really takes the cake. Can't remember a single session of editing where I was spewing insults on the creators and the program itself. Mind you, that was with like 6 months' worth of hands on Mac usage for assignments and many hours using FCP for this assignment. Seriously it's retarded. Can't wait for this module to end.

In any case. Demotivational week. Shit tons of work to do, nuff' said. I hope next week gets better...



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